What I Am Not

I do have the right
To demean, to be mean
But how come I forget
All that I regret
Walking on thin deck

I too have the right
To cheat, regretfully to fleet
But how come I hate
All that I put in faith
I tear as the moon follows my back

I want the right
To fight, flight
But I'm driving
To oblivion, I drink
My sorrow, thinking you'll be back

I don't have the right
I sit, falter to a tear
Steadily I stare
At the moon
All I want is a silent companion

I fall to oblivion
Can't fly, can't flee
So demeaned
Drunk with silence
But you can't see